After getting my morning cup of hot chocolate chai from Cupz, the coffee shop on University and College, I was thinking about writing a blog and how I would refer to the guy that I talk to every morning I go in there. I don't know his name, but we talk more and more as though we are friends. That led me back to an idea I've held onto for a while. What makes someone a friend, best friend, or just friendly?
A friend recently told me about the secret garden on campus. Ironically, there is a small sign on the ground with an arrow pointing inside that says, ‘Secret Garden’. It is such an escape from campus. This is my first time actually coming here to write, but it’s quiet. When I first got here, I was the only one. Since then, a few people have walked through, but there is only one other girl here on her computer. So for those of you who have not seen it, I took a few pictures.
This is what you see when you first walk in.
I’m sure you are dying to know how I define friends. Wait no longer.
Most people I know are in the friendly category. People I see at school, work, church, or coffee shop, are all friendly. Until we both make an effort to hang out outside of our usual place of contact, we will only be friendly. This is important simply because once people know you they are generally nice. It doesn’t mean though that they want to hang out with you in their free time. A friend would.
Being a friend is a two way street. Both people need to be willing to make time and hang out. If there is one person always asking to hang and the other always too busy, something is wrong. I have been on both sides of it, but it really works best when both are mutual friends.
I have 3 best friends. For me, I will do anything for my best friends. None of them live in Arizona, but if they needed me, I’d drop everything and go to either Utah or NC. Come to think of it, I think only one of them knows that. All are guys, which makes sense. In fact, if I move out of AZ, 2 of the 3 have offered and want me to live with them. I think it would be amazing, obviously. So really a best friend is someone you love.
What do ya’ll think? Do you hold your definitions differently? Do you care what you call people, whether it is friend, acquaintance, or best friend?
I have enjoyed reading your blog, and I would like to say that I love visiting the secret garden. I've been told there are concerts there sometimes, but I have yet to be there during a time like that.
ReplyDeleteAs far as someone I consider a friend I hadn't really thought about the definition in the exact way that you have, although I don't necessarily disagree with you. You make reference to 3 types of people - friendly people, friends and best friends. I believe that friendly people are exactly that - friendly. They have a respect for people in general and may talk occasionally with you, hold open a door, etc. They are what I would consider the majority of the population, although I believe that that is quickly declining, but that can be saved to talk about at another time. So, when does a friendly person become a friend? I believe that the conversation does have to become more, although I don't believe that you have to meet during your free time to be friends. Now, if they are best friends there should be some free time spent together, but as a college student you should also understand that people get busy with life. There is school, work, and a multitude of other things going on that steal away our time. Friends understand this and will not try to take you away from those things, but will still talk to you where you normally see them. It wasn't until about 4 years ago that I met someone who became what I consider a true best friend. We lived far apart but we would talk on the phone for hours at a time about many different things like life, family, and a lot about religion. I trust them completely with my life, and I believe that is a key element of being a best friend - trust. I have friends that I partially trust, but not in that complete sincere way that I trust my best friend. As far as friendly people go, I might let them in on a little about my life, but until I have learned more about them as well I would not trust them with secrets or my home address. I also agree with the fact that a best friend is someone that you love and that completely ties in with trust. Through a best friend you should be able to more easily understand what pure unconditional love is because you would protect them from anything. This makes me reflect to when parents talk about loving their children unconditionally and although I don't understand that completely I believe that our love for a best friend should be something like that.
I love Cupz. Chegg was giving out free drinks from there one day as part of a promotion.
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